Here I am at 4 a.m. enjoying the sleepless night! I mean come on?!?! Is there anyone actually really enjoying such abnormal time? Obviously I have sleeping disorder *glad tho - not an eating disorder hahaha*
I realized that I haven't poured my thoughts into words for quite some months... I mean I know it's summer and I suppose to have more time then... *yeah yeah whatever, stops the bull sh*tting now* Right (what a jerk!) The reason is, actually, during this summer I have my internship with one MNC in AMS and since then my life is pretty much: work, chat, exams, work and work.
**Oh btw, two days ago, my exams result was announced and I pass! Woohaa! :D**
Perhaps, a little flashback can be useful to spill my latest news
Almost four weeks in July, I was avoiding to meet, socialize or talk with anyone - well except in the office obviously! **Seriously, not knowing why yet I enjoyed it* Talked to one friend and he thinks it's normal. Yet, when I decided to tell this to one of girl mate from the church, she thought that I have an issue. *and here is I hate the most* She also gave her opinion by saying that you should not have done that because of tons of reason. Frankly, I respect her - but clearly I don't need your judgment nor advice. I was just telling you my story - and not asking your opinion by the way *sucks* I was annoyed at the time, but decided to stop the conversation and making some jokes. This makes me realize that I did not love her that much to allow her say something about me... in spite of her loving intention - sorry for that...
These days I try to be honest with myself and my surrounding. In other words, I will not pretending to like you - if I don't like you. I will try to understand why, but will not ask for your justification if you are not trying to be honest with me. My point is STOP faking your a**! I hate to see that. You can love or hate me. I don't give a damn sh*t. Clearly, I cannot please everyone in this world - so I'd rather mind my own business... please the one that need to be pleased...
Other issue I had is sarcasm. I have a tendency *well, you experienced it already now* to be a super sarcastic when I am stress. My joke can be funny if you are a sarcastic lover - but can be as sharp as a knife if you are not used to. Yet, again my society have not known me that well. I think it's best if I am not meeting anyone during this 'period' - hahaha...
I think that's it for now.. I have so many things in my mind.. but not sure where to start telling you all...
I miss indo... I miss my friend.. I miss the day when sb truly love me.. *desperate mode*
what the hell! I hate more things to do than being desperate! *slap slap*
a cliche question - why man is so kinderachtig (= childish)? I don't understand... really...
I miss my tv series...
and currently:
dying in boredom *sigh*
which should not be the case considering thousand to do list I have!!! crap crap crap!!!
hmm.. maybe I should get a baby... perhaps it's more fun then... hahhaha:D
*anyone plans to donate? I mean to donate a baby not your 'germ' (please deh!!!)
ok ok.. I should stop - it will only get worse!
1 comment:
oh honey... there.there...
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