Yet, when I am learning.. I am 'losing' one guy for unknown reason, but I was too afraid to ask why. Again, I let it pass...
Last night, I went to the church for the special event on pentecost. Once I am home, I am 'dead' - well.. actually did watch the tele for a couple of minutes on NAT GEO, about the documentation on airplane crash in Indonesia few years ago... and the odd thing is the show shoot the grief from the family of the victims.
*I was actually thinking at the time, how would I react if I was one of them (the family)*
Until this morning (Saturday, 26 May 2007), I received the text message from my mom and there was the shocking news. It was our family bediende - and I will call her as the family assistant from now on - passed away at dawn. For unknown reason, she did pass away with heavy headache - she was in pain and it the most hurting part for me. The family called my mom and said that the burial was on the same day at 11.30 local time.
Honestly, it is a terrible day for me. I am lost... I am just a lost duck... I cannot think properly... just that it is so consuming me because she is as healthy (seems to me) as anyone can be.... The other issue is because she is about to get married in less than a week - How unfair life can be...
I was actually planning to call her these days... (before the wedding) to congratulate her.. that she must be very happy...and we just talk as always... but then I have to work on my thesis... and suddenly this all happened.
I asked God, why? I don't get any answer yet...
Yet, one thing I immediately learn...heard this many times.. but never hit me, until today....
do not put what you can do today until tomorrow, coz maybe tomorrow you are too late.
I am still asking God... and really realise how short life can be...
I am definitely going to miss her... she means a lot to me and my family... she is not just a family assistant as she is our family. For fourteen years she has been with us, never ever she fails my family. She was standing out against people who says or treat us badly. She did her best to keep my family convenient. She was there when I was not able to be there for my family, and she was the one who always cry (out of my core family) when I am home and leaving the city where I born, Surabaya. She might mean nothing to any of you, but she does mean something for our family.
My deep and eternal gratitude to you, Wasis. Hope that we will meet again someday...
with deep condolence,
The Ansari's family
May you rest in peace,
Wasis
26 May 2007
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